Obsessed with Joe

I was seduced by a green mermaid. She came to me on the front of a stark white 20-ounce cup for $5. They told me every drop would be worth it. I took a sip and my life was never the same.

As a pre-teen, I tried coffee at a family wedding. It smelled so good. People seemed so content drinking it with a danish or as an after dinner treat. They craved it first thing in the morning or else someone would get hurt. There were songs about it.  Commercials about family getting together over it. Clothing paying homage to it. Endless wall decor and funny sayings on mugs designed just for the drink itself!

Yet, all I could remember was almost spitting it out in disgust, once I was finally given a taste. It was bitter and not at all like it's sweet sister, chocolate. How dare this stuff--that's consumed by everyone everywhere around the world, be so... gross. Fast forward years later. Starbucks begin popping up in metropolitan areas across the country. Seattle had given birth to a company who had the perfect formula that would seduce even the non-coffee drinker. Suddenly, those of us who didn't like coffee was tempted by the new combinations of it. You could put chocolate and whip cream on just about anything and I would try it. So, I did. This stuff was grade-A and I was hooked.  

"A venti mocha caramel non-fat, no whip with a single shot, please." was something I rattled off as though it was simple enough.   Hannah, my barista for years learned it quickly. She was cherub, a true sweetheart who no one could hate. We begin exchanging Christmas gifts and soon became legitimate friends. She knew my order by heart and never ever messed it up.  My breakfast was this drink and a protein bar for what felt like 3 years straight. I could rattle it off in my sleep.

In case you're wondering I am now, a grande soy mocha latte with caramel, no whip girl.  

Since my "habit" begin to bankrupt me,  I now make my own most days of the week with Starbucks Mocha Instant packets ($6 for 5). I was disappointed that it wasn't the same as Hannah used to make. I have tweaked it to almost perfection. Go ahead, try it...

ReeNoun's Starbucks Mocha Caramel Latte

STEP 1

10 ounces of Hot Water (depending on cup size, don't feel to brim--you're going to add a bunch of ingredients.) **If you're using the K-Cups, skip to step 3. 

STEP 2

Add a heaping teaspoon of instant coffee.

STEP 3

3-6 Tablespoons of Delight Hershey Creamer

STEP 4

Here's where it gets tricky as we all have different levels of desired sweetness. I only use 1/2 the supplied packet of Instant Starbucks or the one that comes with the K-CUPS). Sometimes only a 1/3, they give you a lot. 

STEP 5

1/2 Cup of Califa Toasted coconut almond milk (*not pictured) or Soy, or skim, or whatever milk you so desire. Stir.

STEP 6

Whipped Cream*Optional

 Be Your Own Barista. (You're still my girl,  Hannah.)

Delight Chocolate Caramel $2.50, Whipped Cream $2.50--ish, Starbucks Keurigs $6.99 (includes 6) on Sale, Starbucks Instant Packs (includes 8) $7.99, ($6.99 or $5.99 at Target)